Life is stressful, as usual. I'm doing way too much in way too little time, as usual. And I feel like a pine cone in a tornado, as usual. BUT, I'm trying to do something about it, which is NOT business as usual.
It all started when my dear hubby and I watched a special on PBS on stress last week. Called "Killer Stress" the show explained scientifically all the damage that stress does to our bodies. The best part, from my point of view, was when they said that being the mother of small children is one of the most stress inducing factors there is, and that for every 1 year lived under extreme stress, our body ages 5.5 years. Not a pretty picture.
Coincidentally, about a week ago the Reverend at my church started offering meditation classes. I had been reluctant to ask DH if I could add yet another thing to my schedule, but this show gave me the excuse I needed and he was completely supportive. So I bit the bullet, bought the textbook and went to my first class Monday night. It was fabulous. I won't say that I achieved a meditative state, but I will say that I left the class more relaxed than I have been in a long time. I also left with major aches in my legs and hips from sitting "criss-cross applesauce" for 45 minutes so when I got home I did some yoga to stretch a little. Keep in mind, I haven't practiced yoga for about 4 years, so it was awkward but good. I went to bed feeling peaceful and relaxed, and slept fabulously.
Today reality crashed back in, with work deadlines, a sick kid, a jury summons to deal with, bills to pay, and Girl Scout field trips to coordinate. But just knowing that I am learning ways to cope with the chaos makes me feel better. Namaste.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
You love her more than me!
That's what Saskia said to me last night, in regards to Fiona. They had a fight, Saskia threw a toy (which hit Fiona in the face) and I put her in time out for it. Honestly it was a mild punishment, she should have gotten something more severe, like being grounded, for lobbing a Polly Pocket house at her sister's head, but I wasn't in the mood. So she got a lecture about expressing her frustration in a more productive, and less violent way, and had to sit on the stairs for 5 minutes. Not exactly a harsh punishment.
A few minutes later I find her crying, saying that I would "never be as nice to her as I was to Fiona". Just because I was comforting her sister after she was hit. We talked, I told her that I love them both equally because they are both my daughters. That they each have unique, special qualities and that I love those things about them, but even if the things are different the amount of my love is the same. And that no matter what happens, I will always love them both with my whole heart.
She nodded as I spoke, but I wonder if it really sunk in? Does she really believe me? Was this comment a passing thing, said in the heat of the moment or does she really believe that I love her sister more? I can understand where she'd get that idea, since Fiona is so needy I do end up spending more of my energy on her. I just don't want her to grow up feeling unloved. I want her to know, with every fiber of her being, that I love her with my whole heart and soul. I don't want her to ever doubt that.
A few minutes later I find her crying, saying that I would "never be as nice to her as I was to Fiona". Just because I was comforting her sister after she was hit. We talked, I told her that I love them both equally because they are both my daughters. That they each have unique, special qualities and that I love those things about them, but even if the things are different the amount of my love is the same. And that no matter what happens, I will always love them both with my whole heart.
She nodded as I spoke, but I wonder if it really sunk in? Does she really believe me? Was this comment a passing thing, said in the heat of the moment or does she really believe that I love her sister more? I can understand where she'd get that idea, since Fiona is so needy I do end up spending more of my energy on her. I just don't want her to grow up feeling unloved. I want her to know, with every fiber of her being, that I love her with my whole heart and soul. I don't want her to ever doubt that.
Friday, September 5, 2008
Hi, my name is Christina...
and I'm a Webkinz addict.
It started off peaceably enough. My daughter got her first Webkinz for her birthday a couple of weeks ago and has been hooked ever since. I started out hating the place, all the errors, breakdowns and things not working would have her crying hysterically because she couldn't do what she really wanted to do. But tonight I saw the other side.
Saskia recently bought some kitchen appliances in order to cook. I kept trying to convince her to buy a kitchen to put them in, but she didn't want to spend 500 Kinz dollars on a room. Then she discovered that she could buy her pet a garden. She was so excited to grow her own food and "get out in the fresh air". But it cost 1000 Kinz dollars. And so it began. I started answering questions for her to earn money. After about an hour I had enough to buy her a garden. But I was hooked. I then played for another hour, bought her a kitchen, a sink and some food. Then I found the arcade games. Lord help me, I finally forced myself to log off after about the thirtieth time my ant was killed in the picnic game. At least I now understand her addiction, let's just hope it's a minor one for both of us!
It started off peaceably enough. My daughter got her first Webkinz for her birthday a couple of weeks ago and has been hooked ever since. I started out hating the place, all the errors, breakdowns and things not working would have her crying hysterically because she couldn't do what she really wanted to do. But tonight I saw the other side.
Saskia recently bought some kitchen appliances in order to cook. I kept trying to convince her to buy a kitchen to put them in, but she didn't want to spend 500 Kinz dollars on a room. Then she discovered that she could buy her pet a garden. She was so excited to grow her own food and "get out in the fresh air". But it cost 1000 Kinz dollars. And so it began. I started answering questions for her to earn money. After about an hour I had enough to buy her a garden. But I was hooked. I then played for another hour, bought her a kitchen, a sink and some food. Then I found the arcade games. Lord help me, I finally forced myself to log off after about the thirtieth time my ant was killed in the picnic game. At least I now understand her addiction, let's just hope it's a minor one for both of us!
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